thank you Latin class, for giving me the tools to write smut in different languages.
It’s gotten to that point wherein I read gay smut like it’s a bedtime story. I’m not even ashamed.
does reading gay smut next to your parents count as an extreme sport
- Teacher: Why are you sleeping in my class? How come you didn't go to bed at a proper time?
- Me: I was reading, I cannot help my love for literature.
- Teacher: Oh alright.
- Me: *whispers to self* gay smut
I was reading Johnlock fanfiction in class the other day and this guy wouldn’t leave me alone and he said “whatcha doing”
And I stared him dead in the eye and said “reading gay porn”
And he laughed and kept messing with me.
Like no you don’t understand I’m sorta actually reading gay porn
I’m a respectable human being, I don’t watch porn. I read it.
When you realise how much gay porn you actually read
- What I say: goodnight.
- What I mean: I'm going to spend the next three hours reading fan-written, homosexual smut before falling asleep crying about some fictional character's death (there are a lot to choose from) so don't talk to me.
Reading fanfic at midnight
- Dad: stop texting and go to sleep
- Me: I'm not texting. I'm reading.
- Dad: oh really? Read the line you're on.
- Line: He roughly shoved his partner against the wall and forced his tongue between the other man's parted lips.
- Me: just kidding I'm texting somebody
- Fan fiction with fluff: Read in the corner of your bed with all the lights off at midnight while you giggle and blush
- Fan fiction with smut: Read in very public places or with family with a perfectly straight face
remember when you used to be real secretive about reading smutty fanfiction and making sure you were the only one in the room and now you read that shit at the dinner table like it’s nothing
I’m not like other girls!XD
I only have guy friends. I mean all girls do is start drama.
Oh my god, i hate sluts!
Other girls my age like to drink and party but i like to stay inside and read or watch netflix! I’m so weird.
All the girls in my school care about is makeup and shopping and all i care about is FOOD and VIDEO GAMES. lol sometimes i think i was born a guy.
This is everything.
[leonard mccoy voice] jim kirk??? nah what a jerk what a— [trips] [hundreds of thousands of photos of jim kirk spill out of jacket] w-what a fuckign asshole i these arent mine im just [gathering them up frantically sweating] listen i just listen fuck [thousands of pictures of jim kirk scatter across the floor] shit fcuk im holding them for spock just listen